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DEALING WITH ARROGANT PEOPLE

An Intellectual Look: Managing tough people might make you want to beat your head against a brick wall!


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Everyone has been there. The important thing is that you can take care of business. While watching How to Remain Positive with Negative People - By Sandeep Maheshwari, I came across a phrase that would have a huge influence on how you check out - and manage determined/difficult folks. The statement reads as follows:


People's interactions are as unique and complicated as the people who have them. People who are arrogant and stubborn are one of the most difficult types of people to deal with. They are always determined and steadfast, which can be a good or bad trait depending on the situation. To deal with these kinds of people in a healthy way, you need to combine psychological understanding, empathy, and strategic communication.

What Makes People Tenacious and Stubborn


People often use the words "tenacity" and "stubbornness" interchangeably, but they mean different things. People usually think of tenacity as a good trait because it means sticking with something even when it gets hard and never giving up. It is the source of many of the greatest things that people have done, from scientific discoveries to social progress.


On the other hand, stubbornness is often seen as a bad trait. It means sticking to your own thoughts or desires no matter what, even if there is evidence to the contrary or good alternatives. People who are stubborn may not want to change, ignore new information, and be closed-minded, all of which can get in the way of personal growth and working together effectively.



Underpinnings in psychology


Understand the psychological reasons behind tenacity and stubbornness if you want to deal with them effectively. There are a number of things that can make someone stubborn or tenacious:


  1. Personality Traits: Some personality traits, like being very careful and wanting things to be the same every time, can make someone more likely to be persistent or stubborn. According to the Big Five personality model, one of the most important traits linked to persistence and goal-oriented behavior is conscientiousness.

  2. Self-Esteem and Identity: For many people, their self-esteem and identity are very connected to what they believe and what they choose to do. It can feel like a personal attack to question their views, which can make them defensive and stubborn.

  3. Fear of Change: Some people feel threatened by change because it makes them feel less stable and in charge. This fear can show up as stubbornness, as people hold on to old beliefs and habits.

  4. Cognitive Biases: The way people think is full of biases that can make them act stubbornly. For example, confirmation bias makes people look for information that backs up what they already believe and ignore evidence that says otherwise.


Tips for Getting People to Engage


When dealing with stubborn and determined people, you need to take a multifaceted approach that values their points of view while encouraging them to be open-minded and flexible. Here are some ideas to think about:


  1. Get to know each other and build trust


Building a foundation of trust is very important. If someone feels understood and respected, they are more likely to be open to hearing other points of view. Building this relationship can be helped by actively listening, showing empathy, and genuinely wanting to know their point of view.


  • Active Listening: means not only hearing what is being said, but also getting what the person saying it means. Reflective listening skills, like paraphrasing and summarizing, can show that you are really interested in what is being said.

  • Empathy: Show empathy by recognizing how they feel and validating what they've been through. This doesn't mean you agree with them, but you do see where they're coming from.


2. Don't use force, but reason


Trying to make someone change their mind can backfire and lead to resistance and entrenchment. Instead, use techniques of persuasion that make them think about themselves and slowly change their minds about what they believe.


  • Socratic Questioning: This method involves asking people thoughtful, open-ended questions that make them think about their beliefs and look at things from different points of view. It can help to ask, "What evidence supports this view?" or "Have you thought about other possibilities?"

  • Motivational Interviewing: This is a technique that is often used in counseling to help people get over their doubts and find their own drive to make a change. To do this, you have to show empathy, find gaps between your current actions and your bigger goals, deal with resistance, and boost your self-efficacy.



3. Give instances and proof


It can be convincing to show clear, well-supported evidence, especially if it has something to do with the person's values and concerns. To make your points clear, use data, case studies, and examples from real life. The relevance of your evidence should be based on the person's interests and values.


  • If practicality is very important to them, focus on benefits that are useful in real life. If they care about tradition, show them how new ideas can work with old ways of doing things.


  • Stories make people feel things more than facts. Using personal stories or interesting narratives can help people understand and remember what you're saying.


4. Encourage small steps toward change


Big, sudden changes can be hard to handle and lead to resistance. Making the process easier to handle and less scary can be done by encouraging small, gradual changes.


  • Small Wins: Figure out what small steps you can take that will help things change over time. Celebrate these little wins to keep going and boost your confidence.

  • Gradual Exposure: Bring in new ideas slowly, giving people time to get used to them and accept them. Many people feel less threatened by change and are more open to new ideas when they do this.


5. Deal with your deepest fears and worries


People are often stubborn because they are afraid or worried about something. Getting to the bottom of these problems can help lower resistance and encourage a more open mind.


  • Fear of Failure: Help people understand that change does not mean they will fail. Stress how important it is to learn from your mistakes and how you can grow.

  • Loss of Control: Reassure people that they are still in charge of the choices they make and how quickly things change. Including them in making choices can also help ease this fear.


The Art of Navigating Human Complexity


Dealing with stubborn and determined people is an art that requires a deep understanding of how people think and feel, as well as strategic communication and a genuine respect for different points of view. It is possible to have more constructive and peaceful interactions by getting to know each other, using persuasion techniques, giving relevant evidence, encouraging small steps of change, and addressing underlying fears.



Keep in mind that being persistent and stubborn is not always a bad thing. They come from deeply held beliefs, values, and needs for stability and control. When used with empathy and strategic insight, these traits can lead to good results, building resilience and perseverance and, in the end, personal and group growth.


The way people interact with each other, especially those who are adamant about their beliefs, makes us think of the complicated dance of communication and understanding. We not only learn how to deal with the difficulties of human relationships through dance, but we also learn more about ourselves.



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